How I Ended Up This Way's Blog











{August 25, 2010}   How finding an old poem got me to look at the positives

Hi everyone!

Sorry it’s been so long since my last post. I’ve felt a bit depressed of late. Some of you know I that I am moving at the end of the month. I love, absolutely love, the home I am in now and am despondent over having to leave. I also, feel that in some ways, I have disappointed my kids, my family and myself.

However, in life, sometimes we all have to make choices. Some may be turn out to be wrong decisions, some will lead you to a better life. Still, having to move this time, sucks. I am 40 years old, have three kids and having to move back in with my parents. On the surface, how pathetic is that? However, this decision, as disappointing as it may seem now, is actually one of those decisions that will turn out to better each of our lives in the long run. Actually, not so long run…. about two years. So, giving up my independence, my kids home, moving in with my parents will allow me to finish school earlier, pay off every bill I owe, buy my daughter a car (which she needs so much now) and if we stay another year or two, possibly buy our own home. So although it sucks now, it will benefit us in so many ways with which I would not be able to accomplish if my parents had not opened their home to us, would take us much, longer to do, if ever.

My parents know how much my independence means to me. I mean, not many grown adults, especially with kids, can live under the same roof as their parents again. It’s tough. Even for those of us who have a great relationship with our parents. My kids are just like me. They want independence, they want their own home, not having to live with family.

I say all that, to tell you this: my father, my loving sometimes irritating dad (I love you dad!) without me asking or even considering the idea, is turning his garage into a temporary home for us. How considerate is that!

My dad and mom have forever been there for me and for my kids. Emotionally, and monetarily when needed. This is just another gesture of their generosity. Although, I have to credit dad with this idea!

My parents have given me, with this temporary home, independence, a sense that we are holding our own (as I refuse NOT to pay them something in rent) and in two years or less, I will be debt free, including my daughter’s car, and finishing up school. I will finally be able to take that last step in moving forward with my life by changing my situation from barely getting by to becoming debt free and saving for a better life.

So, turns out this decision is one of the smartest decisions I probably could have made. The kids have accepted this and in time, they will understand why this decision was the one I had to make today. I can only pray that they will see me as a stronger person for making this choice and be thankful for making it.

My dad has been looking for a poem he read years and years ago, I was still in high school. It was since misplaced. Actually, it was in an old family album with my basketball pictures, and I had borrowed the album to make copies. So, dad, with love I dedicate your favorite poem to you, here for the world (at least my wonderful followers) to see:

FATHER

 4 Years:  My Daddy can do anything. 

 7 Years:  My Dad knows a lot, a whole lot.

 8 Years:  My Father doesn’t know quite everything.

12 Years: Oh well, naturally Father doesn’t know that either.

14 Years:  Father? Hopelessly old fashioned.

21 Years:  Oh, that man is out of date. What did you expect?

25 Years:  He knows a little bit about it, but not much.

30 Years:  Maybe we ought to find what dad thinks.

35 Years:  A little patience. Let’s get Dad’s assessment before we do anything.

50 Years:  I wonder what Dad would have thought about that. He was pretty smart.

60 Years:  My Dad knew absolutely everything!

65 Years:  I’d give anything if Dad were here so I could talk this over with him.

                     I really miss that man.

Til next time…..PEACE

AJ

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marinasleeps says:

Awww … I know what you mean. It sucks but I didnt start appreciating my parents til after I moved out, got married, and popped out a couple of babies.

You will be fine. You will spend some time with your parents. It will be good for the kids as well.



Yea, but we’ve lived own our own for so long. But I guess sometimes with divorce, you have to take a step back to take a leap forward. That’s the way I’m looking at it!

I subscribed to your blog, I have the same link if you want to subscribe 🙂

Take care,
AJ



Jessica says:

aww.. I like that.. Too bad there isn’t a “like” button on here:) Love u Aunt Angie!



Aww, thank you. I love you too! there should be a “like” button on the blog view at the top. I will check.

Thank you and you know how much I love you!
AJ



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