How I Ended Up This Way's Blog











{February 6, 2013}   Will I Sleep Tonight After This?

Hey guys! Welcome. It doesn’t take much to entertain me. We all know that. I’ve accepted it, most of you have accepted it. At least I hope you have. If not, I’ll be getting some angry tweets . . . but then again, who cares! I’m joking, of course. OR am I??

Let me first apologize for the funky way this blog looks. Let’s just say, I don’t like when things change! I haven’t been able to take the time (actually the patience) to continually mess with the new format on WordPress so that is pleasing to your beautiful eyes, and I’m . . . well, let’s just say “not happy” about it!

Maybe it’s because some things have recently been settled in my life that have plagued me mentally and physically for what seems like forever, maybe it’s because I’m happier now than I have been in a very long time or maybe, and this is just a guess here, but just maybe my sense of humor really is as warped as I have said many times. Whatever the reason, this story just struck my funny bone and I’m still laughing over it! Did I mention, I’m easily amused and distracted? Oh, I thought so.

These are some ads from the 1950’s, as stated in the article. These are just the top five I felt deserved the honor of being profiled in this collection. Listen, I know the 50’s were a totally different time; I get that. People looked different, they dressed different and cartoon characters looked different. But seriously, these photos really are . . . eye-catching. And they say commercial ads are too “scary” for children today.

          5)  Yea, this makes me want to run right out for some chocolate! :

creepy-children-vintage-50s-ads-chocolate-kid-head-series

           4)  No wonder “Beaver Cleaver” didn’t want to take a bath! :

creepy-children-vintage-50s-ads-pears-zombie-child-bathtub Pears soap

            3)  Who said I wanted to “DYE”??? Well, I certainly don’t want to NOW! :

creepy-children-vintage-50s-ads-dye-cat-bloog-scary dye company

          2)  I’ll just agree with the original caption on this one. The girl, the ONLY kid without an ice

              cream mind you, looks too much like that freaky girl who played in “The Orphan”. But in

              case she sees this, I REPEAT . . . These are not MY words, so don’t come after me to

              teach me “I must be killed to be put out of my pain.” Just asking, please. We good? :

creepy-children-vintage-50s-ads-possessed-girl-ice-cream looks like Ester

          1)  Notice the word “barbiturate” here? Of course, with that Pears’ Soap, the kid probably

               needed this shit! :

creepy-children-vintage-50s-ads-nembutal-black-eyes

Seriously, I wonder if I’ll ever sleep again! One day I’ll learn. “Stay focused and don’t get distracted AJ!!”

Until next time . . . PEACE

AJ

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{January 19, 2012}   Ten Things

December 27, 2013

Hey guys! Welcome! I originally posted this blog last January. Since I’ve gained many new reader’s recently, I thought I’d repost . . . Just to give you a little insight in to who “AJ” is. I hope you enjoy!!

January 18, 2012

Hello everyone. Welcome back!! As most of you know, last year I decided to take a bit of time off from blogging for personal reasons. One day, when it’s not so raw, I’ll write and tell you all about it. For now, it’s just good to be writing again. I hope you are as excited to read about my crazy life as I am to tell you about it!

I thought I would start by refreshing my readers as well as give some insight to my new readers into who I am, my writing style and more importantly, my odd, sometimes very weird, sense of humor.

So, here we go.

Ten Things You May Not Know About Me; But Should:

10. I am addicted to the TV show “Toddlers & Tiaras”. I’m not certain whether I am in awe

       of the girls or dumbfounded by the moms. Maybe both.

9.  I strive to be a peaceful person. I try to think before I speak. However, what you don’t know,

     is there is someone in my life that I secretly hate …. more and more. It’s a never-ending

     conflict within myself.

8.  I think Bill Goldberg is the epitome of a male role model. It’s very clear in his everyday

      public life he strives to be . . . better. I am proud to have my son look up to him.

Now for the fun part 🙂

7.  Sometimes, I make my kids watch the cartoons “Fairly Odd Parents” and “Dexter’s

     Laboratory” just so I can watch it without looking like a loser (yes, I know, that ship has

     sailed!). Who can turn down two faeries and a genius scientist? Not me!

6.  I can’t focus on anything unless my bed is made…forget the rest of the room…

5.  I cuddle with my cat. Not crazy enough? Ok, my cat and I sleep chest to chest with her paw

     touching the side of my check 🙂 isn’t that sweet? Or does that fall under mental?

     hummmm….

4.  I speak German, a bit of Spanish and American Sign Language. With my sucky memory,

      it’s not an easy task!

3.  Stewie from “Family Guy” I find strangely hilarious. As you can tell, I am easily amused.

2.  I am a hippy at heart.

NOW for the big one…..

1. I have three tattoos! I know, I look so sweet and *cough, sorry I choked on that word…innocent (damn cough again!) but I have me a wild hair.

Hopefully, I have shared some good things with you so that you aren’t ill with me for being gone so long. Maybe if I tell you where my tattoo is?

Here’s one more for the road : I know a perversely amount of meaningless trivia!!

Until Next Time . . . PEACE

AJ



{June 20, 2011}   My Dog Is The Best Dog Ever

Hi all! Welcome.

As the title of this blog states, my dog, Ryoki, is the best and greatest dog EVER! Actually, she’s more of my dad’s dog. But I claim her as mine now.

And I’m going to tell you why. I think you’ll agree she is really something special.

Ryoki

The other night, I was going through some of my boxes. I moved into an add-on at my parents home last year to try to get back on my feet and get some other things in order. The longer I stay here, the more I think about what’s in those boxes and how tired I am of the items. So, every now and then, I’ll go through them and give some things away. I just gave all my plates to my niece. I picked out some pots for her and some silver wear for my mom along with just taking some
of my baking items out for use. By the way mom, the baking items are still mine
. . . but you can use. I love to bake.

 Anyway, I was taking some things inside the house. As usual, I had overloaded my arms and had no possible way to open the screen door. My mom’s screen door handle is broken, so it doesn’t “catch”. This is great for Ryoki because when she has to go out, she pushes the screen door ever so slightly and goes out. She hasn’t mastered knocking the door hard enough for it to bounce open wide enough so she can stick her head in to get back in . . . but she does knock when she wants back in.

Now, in the past, I have mentioned how she is the “favored sister”. And in truth, she really is. But I don’t mind, especially after what she did the other night.

There I stood outside the door, my arms so full I couldn’t even use my elbow to nudge the screen door open, saying “Someone please get the door”. I was nice at first. After all, there were five
people in the house; my three kids, their dad and both my parents, just feet away from the door. No one came to my assistance. However, I did see Ryoki standing inside the door. Again, and a little louder, I said “Can someone get the door???” Apparently, they were too busy to be bothered. Again, I see pretty little Miss Ryoki standing by the screen door. But wait, she was coming my way. Gently, she edged the door open and backed up. Dang dog. Was she teasing me? She already poops right outside my door (my door leads directly outside; she doesn’t poop in the
house). Great. Now, she’s found a new way to diss me. Which, I let her know I didn’t appreciate.

She then pushed the screen door open a little farther. Holy cow, I thought. Was she trying to open the door for me? I didn’t catch the open part quickly enough with my shoulder. So, testing the waters, I said “One more time Ryoki, I couldn’t get that one.” All the while five people were standing in the dining room; only a few feet into the house.

And, I’ll be damned. Ryoki not only opens the door, she opens it a bit wider and holds it until I catch it with my shoulder! I couldn’t believe it! I figured she was going to come outside and
that was her ultimate reason for opening the door. Yet as I nudged the screen door open, and took the one step up that led me into the house, she backs up, looks up at me wagging her tail and I swear people, she was smiling! She knew exactly what she was doing! Very impressive Ryoki!

I went around to every person in the house and bragged on her, considering they were content to ignore my pleas for someone to open the door, I felt I was justified.

As I relayed the story to my mom asked me “did she go on outside?” I proudly informed her, “No, she simply opened the door for me. Once she saw I had the door and was coming in, she backed up for me.”

How freakin’ genius is my dog?! And I thought she didn’t even like me, considering you know, the pooping outside my door and all. I think I can truly say she is my sister now with pride . . . after all, she still is a dog.

Until
next time . . .

  A.J.



{May 27, 2011}   You Are Mine

Hi everyone! Welcome back. I know, it’s been too long.

Most of you know my niece. I’ve talked about her. I’ve shown a picture here and there. She’s just  so adorable . . . everyone agrees. Well, I’m going to show you a little window into that baby’s world; as she sees it.

 

I’m going to call her Sasha. I’m not sure if her mom would want me to mention her name or not . . . plus, Sasha is a cool name. I could so be a Sasha.

Let me tell you a few things about her. She’s two years old. She has beautiful blonde hair, hazel eyes and a “conquer the world” attitude. Her mom is working with her on her colors. Girl doesn’t know them all . . . but dammit, she will ask for her “purple paci”. Purple, she knows.

My oldest daughter has gotten Sasha hooked on a group called Alice Nine specifically, the lead singer Shou. Or as Sasha calls
him, Sho-Sho. She is very adamant about her feelings for him. “Sho-Sho” is . . . and I quote, “hers”. End of story. You just have to understand this one thing; don’t mess with Sho-Sho. It doesn’t matter what she is doing, when she hears the group’s music, she pops up and goes into a daze watching them. Sort of like me when I hear Charlie Daniels.

She recently enlisted my daughters help in writing him a letter. Basically, saying general things “hi, what are you doing? I have a paci” you know, really important things. Alas, before the letter is finished, she had her own things to tell him . . . some of it she told us, some she kept as a secret. People, remember she’s two. I thought I’d share the letter with you. It sort of takes me back do the second grade and the “check yes or no” letters. Sasha’s letter is a bit more . . . well, let’s just say she doesn’t give the option of using the “check box”.

Dear Sho-Sho,

 

I like my paci.

Where are you? 

I love you.

 

You are mine.

 

Sasha

Ahhh . . . to be young again.

Until next time……Peace

A.J.



{March 9, 2011}   Mini Me Part II

Hello everyone! This past week, I put a lot of work into my upcoming book “Confessions 2 AJ”. As I was working through the background graphics, I ran across something I thought would be fun to share with you.

I recently wrote a blog about my very own “mini-me” 14 year old daughter. I tried to paint an accurate and very clear picture to show just how much she was like me. From her athletic ability to her looks and right down to her writing. When I read this piece, I thought, “Now this, pure irony”. It’s almost as though I wrote the following words myself.

I would like to share this particular piece of work written by my daughter to her readers. It is an author’s note which appears before chapter eleven of her book. You read right, chapter eleven. She’s already running circles and leaving dust around me!

I have to say however, I am so very humbled with the how she reaches out to her readers to describe “Confessions”. I guess you could say she’s pimpin’ for confessions for me! The pride in her as she tells her reader’s about the book overwhelms me.

Isn’t it wonderful when your children do something so special without your input? All because she is proud; I am very blessed.

I hope you enjoy the view on “Confessions”  as seen through the eyes of a 14 year old. I would love to hear your feedback on her writing style. As I said, it’s right up my ally!

. . . I have a few confessions to make. A lot of people think they’re gross–weird–even quirky. Other than being a total perfectionist in grammar, I have the habit of drinking ketchup–out of the packet and straight out of the bottle! I just like ketchup, okay?

So…been a long month…I haven’t posted in a while…please don’t kill me. Anyway, my mother is an author, and she’s writing a book called, “Confessions to A.J.” Yeah, I know I may be boring you with this, I’m not usually serious, but just bear with me, and it’s pretty useful. Basically, what it is, is a bunch of confessions—about anything at all—sent in to my mother, and she puts them together in a book. Like, “I cheated on by boyfriend!” or “I have excessive nipple hair!” (That one was a little disturbing…) But anyway, you can submit (through a review or message, if you don’t want others to know) any secret you may have, and it’s totally confidential. No names will be mentioned, and it’s actually pretty cool. They are all anonymous and you won’t have to live with that nagging in the back of your mind telling you to do bad things like streak naked in Wal-Mart and trash the garden department. Oh…that’s just me…never mind…

 She has a website its: Ajdaily.com and her email is Aj@Ajdaily.com (De ja vu?) She actually writes a lot like me. In the whole warped-demented—must be a demon from the depths of hell—kind of way. Her writing is so much like mine, that’s it’s getting to be insanely creepy now. I mean, I could deal with the whole looking similar thing, but this is just too far! It’s like she’s constantly reading my mind and writing down my craziest thoughts. You ever feel that way?

You ever feel like the cookie monster on a mad, psychotic, axe murdering rampage? Oh, guess that’s just me again. Anyway, if you have like a confession—any secret (I drink ketchup, shh!)—just leave it in a review, or message me. It can be a funny one, a made-up one, anything. And in the next chapter, I just might let you in on a few of my confessions.

Chapter eleven! Or maybe it’s technically ten because of my author’s note…oh well! Screw my calculations! Enjoy !

 

You have to love a kid this messed up! Now if you’ll excuse me, I should go wipe the tears of joy away before they get here with the straight jackets. Did I tell you? We’re getting matching jackets!

Until next time……Peace

A.J.



et cetera