I Kissed a 300lb Clown

Hello everyone, welcome back!

You may be wondering what exactly I meant by the title of this blog. Surely, I really did not kiss a 300lb clown, right? That’s just plain ridiculous! You may be more inclined to believe the title if it were something like “I Kissed A Girl” or “I Kissed The Bartender”. Am I right? Would the thought of me kissing a girl or the bartender be more comforting for you? Well, I assure you, I wish I could have titled this blog either of those titles other than the one I forced to acknowledge.

Yes, I shamefully admit, I kissed a 300lb clown. Not just a 300lb clown but a “disgruntled 300lb clown”. Sigh. Give me a chance to explain, if this sort of thing can ever be explained away.

 

 

When I began this blog, I wrote how I wanted to help others that were going through some of the same issues, feelings and disappointments I had recently experienced. I wanted to show those same people, no matter how they felt now, no matter how hopeless things seemed, they were not in this alone. I wanted to show, it is possible to find the lost person inside of you; it was only a matter of whether or not you wanted to begin the journey that would lead you down this path.

During all this, I made a promise. I would always be honest, with myself and my readers. As painful and embarrassing as it is sometimes, I have done my best to be completely honest. I will not post, unless I can be honest. So, yes, I kissed a 300lb clown. If I keep saying that, maybe it won’t seem so weird. It’s not working for me so far.

Here’s the situation. After my ex left, several months after, I went to Macon, GA where my best friend lives. She and I went to the Comedy Club which is right next to a very popular club called Whiskey River. Due to where my life was at the time, and my feelings of hurt, betrayal and my short comings, I would drink quite a bit. My kids were never with me when I drank, but I drank all the same.

After drinking for hours, we were set to leave, quite buzzed. We were standing outside speaking with a nice guy but trying to shake him. The clown and his opening comedy act (the Clown is actually really popular and has a great career) were both standing out on the balcony and sent their security guard down to us to ask if we were ok and ask would we have a moment to speak with them.

Pretty cool, huh? This had never happened to me before. Still buzzed, we followed him to the balcony. Now, things are a little fuzzy here. I personally believe it’s the denial that immediately kicked in after the buzz wore off a few hours later. However, John (the clown) somehow got my number. People, we are talking a very successful comedy act here. He even had a yacht in South Beach. I guess that is why, at that particular time, I said “why not” and let him. . . hold on a sec . . . got to take a few deep breaths. Ok, the kiss happened. Ewww…

 

So, that is how my night of feeling less than the person I now, know I am, mixed with a good buzz led me to kiss “The Disgruntled Clown”. It took me a lot longer, however, to live down the actual fact that I really let this happen. Needless to say, my best friend loved this night!

Word of advice, don’t get buzzed around clowns. I’m just saying.

 

I have to go take something that will wipe this memory from my mind. Damn being honest with you people!

Until next time……Peace

A.J.